Balancing friendships as an adult can definitely be tough, especially when you’re trying to balance everything in your life. Life is definitely like being a juggler, and as someone who cannot juggle to save her life I struggle.
Over the last year of lockdowns, I’ve definitely learned a lot about how to be a present friend when it comes to being separated. How am I learning to balance these friendships?
Look after the friendships that matter
I think that back in the day we focused on the number of friends we had, like with Facebook, we would add everyone we had ever met. As you get older, it is all about the quality of friends we have.
There are levels to friendships. There are friends, and then there are friends that you can count on, on your worst days. These are the people who will:
- support you through your darkest times
- let you be yourself
- let you speak your mind
- be honest with each other
- let you cry when you need to.
Those are the people you need in your life, the people you need to surround yourself with and the friendships you need to nurture.
Sometimes there are people you genuinely need to cut out of your life, maybe they’re toxic friendships, maybe they’re the kind of people don’t make the effort with you as much as you do with them, and that is okay. It is okay to let go of those friendships.
Try and stay in contact as much as possible
I’m not saying you would be able to contact that person every single day, I mean that would be completely impossible to be able to message someone every single day. But there are a few ways that you can stay in contact, even if it is just once a month.
The right friends will understand that you cannot message each other everyday, or talk everyday. Some people might be juggling families, full time jobs and just trying to deal with the day to day stuff. It is so tough, and I am definitely trying to learn to stay in contact better. Sometimes it can just be a little Facebook or WhatsApp message, or it could be a phone call for a catch up.
I feel like the last year we haven’t been able to be together as much as we would have liked, so we can sometimes do things like a virtual meet up over Zoom. Those times with your friends is so important, and it can really help your overall wellbeing. I’m definitely still that inconsistent friend though.
We all need stuff to look forward to after over a year of lockdowns, so making plans can be so good for your overall wellbeing. Make plans to do something fun, even if it is just a catch up over a coffee or a chance to video call, whatever that may be, find something that you both can enjoy.
If you can’t make the plans that week, it is okay. Life happens, things come up, life doesn’t always go to plan and that is just the way it is. True friends will understand that, they will check in on you, support you and arrange for another day, it is totally okay in my book.
Juggling friendships is hard. Sometimes those friendships come into your life for a reason, and other times they leave. That is okay.
How do you juggle friendships? Let me know in the comments!
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