If there is one thing that I’m good at, it is overthinking. I do it on a regular basis, and my mind basically likes to spend most of my days overthinking every possible situation. When you struggle with anxiety, I have found that this is definitely heightened and trying to switch off can be such a struggle. Overthinking can definitely be one of the most difficult things to deal with because even though you can try your best to think rationally, it doesn’t always work like that or is ever that easy.
I feel like I’ve kind of spent most of this year in a bit of a rut, I feel like mentally and emotionally it has been challenging and I can’t seem to pick myself up. With going into lockdown due to coronavirus as well, it has made things even more challenging for me even though it is absolutely necessary for safety.
The thing with overthinking, even the smallest situation like speaking to someone you love and the words they use, you can end up overthinking it all. You will think you’ve annoyed them, you will think that what you’ve said was wrong, that they hate you or that you’ve somehow pushed them away. The smallest situations can put you in the biggest head spin and honestly it is one of the most draining things in the entire world.
Not only that I feel like I have kind of lost my spark, not only creatively but in life as well. I have always struggled with confidence even as a teenager, I would “fake it till I made” but to be honest I have only kind of made it worse during my adult years. I feel like the weight of the world is currently on my shoulders, I feel like people are judging me because of my mental health, because of my journey, and that I am struggling. I worry and think that people are constantly waiting for me to slip up, disappoint them or fail, or just break down completely. The thing is, I don’t feel like I’m far away from that.
I had got to a point when I started my new job that I wasn’t going to let people’s opinions get in my way, I was going to be myself, work hard and keep my spark alive, but I feel like I’ve managed to diminish myself, not because of my job or anything like, I really enjoy what I do, but I tend to bring work home with me, I tend to over think everything and let my own insecurities get in the way.
The worst bit is I know I am better than that. I know my head is basically playing tricks on me, I know that I can learn from my mistakes, and that I’m not a big disappointment or people are waiting for me to fail but that is the problem with anxiety and overthinking every situation. I really just need to get out of my own head and remind myself that I am stronger than I realise.
Right now I currently feel like I’m on a small boat floating out to sea with no anchor with no full understanding with how to anchor myself. I know the lockdown is hard for so many, and my family and in laws are normally my anchors, they keep me sane and help to think clearly, but the fact that I can only speak to them on the phone and not see them all, it makes it really hard for me and I’m not dealing with it particularly well.
I’m forever wondering if I actually have the potential to achieve as much as I want in life, if I am ever going to be able to make a decision without overthinking every situation, but I am determined to try my best. Because let’s be honest if my best isn’t good enough then I don’t know if anything else ever will be. So what am going to do?
1. Find my happy place
Working from home has been hard, but I am creating my own sanctuary so I am able to relax, switch off, make sure that I don’t feel the urge to log on early, overwork myself. I need to make sure that my happy place isn’t filled with work.
2. Tell my mind to stop
Easier said than done, I know. However I’m trying to tell my mind to stop, so I can at least think about this rationally. My mind isn’t a rational place when it is overthinking everything so I need to try and slow my mind down.
3. Remind myself that there is only so much I can do
This is true, and I’m just one human being, and all that can ever be asked of me is to do my best. Your best will have to be enough, set your list up at the beginning of the day to make sure you have a clear plan, that way you’re not bouncing from one thing to another.
4. Remember that you are enough and you can do this
I need to be reminded of this daily, I always feel like I’m never going to be enough and that I won’t be able to achieve everything I need, but I can do this because I need to finally start believing in myself a bit more.
5. Find my anchor
I know I am capable of anchoring myself again, I’m definitely going to make the most of speaking to my family, finding my place at work, at home and within the blogging community.
Here’s to hoping I can do this. Are you an overthinker like me? What are your tips?
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I relate so much to this post, thank you for writing it :). Overthinking is a duly struggle and it can be so exhausting because your mind just never takes a break! One thing I found useful was to tell myself to worry about something that was on my mind later. I’ll say to my self, you can worry about that later, just to let it leave my head at that moment. Then the beauty is you don’t worry about it later but it’s let you forget in that moment 🙂
Lon x
This is so relatable, especially the line “the smallest situations can put you in the biggest head spin” this is totally me! I am such an overthinker and I think with things being so uncertain and having all this extra time at home makes it much more of an issue. Thank you for sharing these helpful tips Amie, such a useful post <3 xx
Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com
This was a lovely read – I’ve always been an over thinker too but like you, I’ve been finding ways of stopping it like finding a happy place and also trying to rationalize what I’m thinking!
I am the biggest overthinker I know! I’m constantly doing it, I overthink about overthinking sometimes! I’m a little better than I used to be, I try to be more rational and think things through before getting myself into a panic! x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
I’m to have an issue with overthinking, then I go into panic’s. I just have to learn to calm down, otherwise I get in trouble sometimes which does not help
Nic | Nic’s Adventures & Bakes
Oh Gosh, I am such an overthinker! I’ve been trying to remember that worrying doesn’t achieve or change anything, so stop worrying about things! Easier said than done. I think in times of higher stress it is s much easier to fall into the trap of overthinking, doesn’t it?
Hope you are doing okay and staying safe. It looks like you have set yourself some goals/help points to work through which is great!
Thanks for sharing!
Aimsy xoxo
Aimsy’s Antics
Overthinking is a killer for me to! I think and think and end up in worse-case scenarios that make the task ahead seem impossible. I freak out indefinitely for no reason and end up doing what I am thinking about without any trouble. I come out looking back and thinking, “man, if only I had just told my mind to stop!”
I love your tips for working through overthinking and coming out anchored. 🙂
The thing about the smallest things is so true! My brain always gets stuck on tiny details and I’ll think about it non-stop for what feels like forever sometimes. This is definitely a testing time for a lot of people mentally, I hope you’re managing the best you can. I hope you can keep your home as your happy sanctuary too x
Sophie
I do this too – I like your “find an anchor” section. So so true!
I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve spent most of this year in a bit of a rut my lovely, being on lockdown doesn’t help at all either. Thank you so much for being so honest and open, and for sharing such a wonderfully written post. I’m sending you so much love. Stay strong, stay home, stay safe. 💜
With love, Alisha Valerie x | http://www.alishavalerie.com
I am terrible at overthinking and being mrs worse case scenario 🙁 I end up making myself feel ill xx
I too am an over thinker. I drive myself completely mad sometimes as I feel like I can’t shut my brain off.
Thanks so much for sharing this honest post! 😊
Love Lozza xo
http://girlygabble.com
There are times when we are better off not overthinking. I love that you’re going to do all of these things! I agree with you – now that you are aware of your actions, you can control it!
Nancy ♥ exquisitely.me
I think this post shares such a good message about how to handle overthinking. I tend to overthink quite a few things too so this has been especially helpful for me. Thank you for sharing! 🙂
This post is so relatable. I find that I too fall into the vicious cycle of overthinking and overanalysing things. It tends to plague me even more at night. But in that darkness I try to find an anchor to bring me out of that rabbit hole and that’s usually focusing on what makes me happy.
Thanks for sharing
I love the find your anchor point, that’s so good. And learning to accept what you can’t change is also one of my faves (that I need to get better at!) Stay safe, Amie x
Lisa | http://www.lisasnotebook.com
I overthink all the time and I tend to go to the worst case scenarios, rather than good outcomes. Now I’ve realised that it’s been slightly easier to tell my brain to stop because, 99% of the time, the outcome of what I’ve been worried about hasn’t been the worst case scenario!! Sending you much love 🙂 xx
Holly | http://www.gollymissholly.uk
This was a great read and I can relate in more than one way – Love the 5 steps of what you’re going to do
I always have a problem with overthinking too, especially in uncertain times like this, so I related to a lot of what you said. Thanks for sharing! I hope you’re doing well! 🙂
melissakacar.blogspot.com
This is a great post. I am also an overthinker and when I do too much. I just stop because I know my over thinking will not change anything at all. I have to trust myself and the process. It was hard getting to that stage of my life. But I’ve decided to put my happiness above everything. Thank you for sharing some tips!
“Remind myself that there is only so much I can do” wow. Yes. That is everything when I’m about to fall down that rabbit hole of over thinker…when I get real and remind myself of that it soothes me…doesn’t always settle me completely but helps a lot
This is such a great post. I tend to overthink a lot too and I need to stop that!
I always try to compartmental everything in my head these days & ask myself, well what’s the worst that could happen?? It really helps.
Leigh x
PS. I’m glad you carried on with the blog.
This is so relatable! I remind myself that there’s only so much I can do every day because I’m such a perfectionist and feel down when I haven’t achieved everything I wanted to that day. Thank you for sharing such a personal post Amy xx
Leanne | Latte Leanne
This is such a heartfelt post and one I can relate to far too much, especially with feelings of never being good enough and never being able to achieve what I’ve worked so hard towards. I guess just keep clinging to those five things you’ve set out, even when times are hard, and that will help remind you of what helps? I hope you’re okay, sweetheart, and best of luck with everything.
I relate to this post SO much! I am the queen of over thinking and I need to give my brain a rest too!! Always here for a chat!
Rosie
Oooh, yet another relatable post you have here. I need to screenshot it and make it my desktop background, really, for all those times panic starts to build inside my head. Isn’t it strange when your own brain beats itself up while also knowing that it’s actually better than that? Such a paradox!
Lovely post! Such a refreshing read and glad to know there are others out there like me 🙂 Thanks for sharing!